Anger is a completely normal, usually healthy, human emotion. But it becomes very destructive when it overcomes the limit. It can direct to various problems— starting from
problems of personal life to problems of corporate life. It highjacks the peace
of mind and leaves the person in a complete imbalanced state.
It’s true that anger can’t be reduced to zero, but it can be reduced to almost zero
by continuous practice to control. Below practice works as the tulsi (Basil) to
It is always easier to advise others on their problems but when it comes
to our individual we can’t manage our emotions to get rid of the problem. Ex: A renowned surgeon does not dare to do any
kind of surgery in his/her son or daughter. Its only happens due to emotional
attachment. We can easily handle other’s emotion but very difficult to handle own.
But it is possible to control our emotion. When one will be able to treat
oneself different from himself/herself, control of anger is not far from there.
He has to look at himself from a different angle. As sometimes though we are
physically present somewhere but actually present somewhere else, similarly we
need to think ourselves different in the situations which create anger. As long
as we will not be managing ourselves to detach from us, it’s quite difficult to
handle our own emotions. It sounds imaginary but it’s a practiced exercise.The stimulus creates the response which leads to action. The whole process is called anger cycle.
Stimulus —– Response —– Action
There is a gap between stimulus and response and another gap between response and
action. The technology behind controlling the anger lies on the analysis of
above mentioned gap. The well we can manage the gap the better we can achieve a
control on anger.
The first gap gets created when some set of rules which are created by us get
broken by others. Ex: Somebody gets angry when he sees somebody wasting food.
It’s obvious that he’ll get angry when he sees somebody wasting food. Unless
until he changes the rule of not getting angry on seeing somebody wasting food,
he’ll be getting irritated & this will make him angry.
The second gap gets created when we react immediately just after the response
without thinking anything. We don’t think the consequences of the action which
we are going to do. This is the biggest blunder we do to support our anger
instead of controlling them.
Here is the biggest key to control. Just before jumping into the action if we will
think for a second, no doubt anger will be in control. But the problem is with
that single second of thinking. It’s not so easy but can be achieved with the
help of the technique described above that is “detachment of emotion”. For this
we need to treat ourselves as a different entity which is an achievable